Saturday, June 17, 2006

Mr Big Stuff.

So I just saw Chris Noth on the N train. Now normally and striahgt black male would have no idea who this was (unless he's a fan on Law and Order which black men typically aren't in any sense), but I happen to have a lot of close friend who are Women or Gay Men. That means any time you hang with a group of women or gay men, there will be viewings of Sex and the City. The if you hang out with one female friend there is a 10% chance you will watch Sex and the City. 2 women and/or gay men = 20% chance. 3 = 40%. 4 = 80%. 5 = 160%. That's right! The increase is exponential!!

If you are hanging out with 5 women/gay men, there is a 160% chance you will watch that show. The extra 60% mean that you will unexpectedly be jostled out of your slumer by a phone call to test how much you retained from the previous evenings show.

So, yes. Chris Noth was Mr. Big. He got up out of his seat and I sat in it. Then I noticed a bunch of girls giggling, staring and then getting very silent. So I looked and I saw who it was. At first I was surprised he was on the subway, but then I thought why wouldn't he ride the subway? If i get some sort of notoriety, I'll ride the subway. Its convient and it something I'm used to. I always find it interesting when people assume a celebrity wouldn't do something normal people do. Like just because Vince Vaughn is Vince Vaughn doesn't mean he's gonna stop eating ham sandwiches. He likes ham sandwiches. He liked them before he was famous and helikes them now. What do you think? Once the first million in went in the bank he was like "Ham and Chesse is too pedestrian, from now on I shall only eat Lobster and Cheese followed by Lamb and Quiche with mayo"? He learned the same lesson we learned from Hammer and Coery Feldman: put some money away because it won't last forever if you do dumb shit. And that's the truth.

8 comments:

Fryda! said...

Awesome! My boyfriend's in love with him! We went through the whole S&C series together and Big is his hero, oy.

Carolyn said...

Noth grabbed a friend of mine around the waist and said, "Ooh - you're a real woman."

So obviously he likes ham sandwiches, too.

AddledWriter said...

The N train is named after him.

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Anonymous said...

Chris Noth hit on me once. With a bat.

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leatherargento said...

I saw him a few months ago at the Starbucks right next to the Joyce Leslie near NYU.

He had been jogging.

I expected him to be shorter.

He was really cool about me letting my words leap up on him like a flood of little caffienated dachsunds, so I yanked back the words' leashes and let him read his New York Times in peace. He's really hot. I'm glad I was wearing my 3-inch heels and black Gap mini jeans-skirt. Maybe he thought about me just a little. I hope. :-D I do have a nice ass and pretty good legs. Anyway, he was really neat and the fact that he wasn't all full of himself like the characters he plays makes him even more attractive.

Anyway, I think it's cool how he doesn't seem to have a "Publicity Strategy" like a lot of actors. He just lives like any other performing artist in NYC, only one who's makin' a prettier penny than most... I.e., Success Hasn't Changed The Man.

I also once saw Yaakov Smirnoff. When I was fifteen or sixteen, he was redcapping at LAX. Being a teenager, I was struck, HARD, by the desire to yell, "WHAT A COUNTRY!" And giggle like a demon. My little sister and my dad kicked me discreetly in the same shin (right shin) at the same time, though, cause they knew what was coming from the look in my eye. I love my family for the fact that, though the lecturing can get heavy (we're Jewish: Moses fasted for 40 days & nights taking dictation for the Almighty), there's still some Old Country (Austria-Hungary) "One Good Trip Over Dad's Knee Cures Lying for X Amount of Time; For Running Into A Busy Street, Please See 'Getting a "Froggie" From Mom'" in them.

I would have HATED to be one 'a them Ultra-Sensitive White Families that Black Comics are so fond of pointing out that do Time Outs. Just hit me when I mess up. I still flinch every time I go for my middle finger or any cuss word.

Anyway, don't know if this makes any sense or is even mildly on topic -- stayed up all last night with my Season One Millennium DVDs....

anna-brooklynn-1351 said...

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